drugs, hotness and paper towels.

As most of you know, my temporary Castle is in the hood of this small little town.. That's right folks.. I got me some gangsters here..  I am in slumtown USA.. and.. I'm finding out.. I just don't fit in with today's cool kids.. and here is why..

One of my neighbors invited me over to snort some Coke..  I'm all in for that shit.. I assumed we were gonna break open a case of Cola and laugh until we giggle snorted coke out our nose...THAT IS NOT WHAT.. SNORT COKE MEANS PEOPLE!!

In my day,, WHO'S LINE IS IT ANYWAY.. was a funny show on TV that if you were totally bored, you could watch...  WHO'S LINE IS IT ANYWAY?  Will get you killed in this neighborhood if you answer it wrong.  Seems that shit is expensive and if you take a line that is not yours.. They will stick a bitch...

I misunderstood when they said I'LL GET ALL UP IN YOUR GRILL.. I thought they were about to go BBQ me a steak.. I was getting the munchies so I yelled..OH YEA,, BRING IT BITCH.... nope.. wrong answer... they did..

Then they asked me if I was interested in running half a football field.. I'm old, but I'm in shape,, so I said..HELL YES...  I did not know that HALF A FOOTBALL FIELD meant..50 rocks of crack...I am not in that good of shape fuckers!!

Being one that loves to do Christmas shopping year around, when they asked if I was ready to HOOK UP THE REINDEER,, I thought we were going to do the ole Santa cop thing and deliver packages to the needy.. um.. no.. just for your information.... it meant..TO INHALE COCAINE.. crap...

When they asked me if I wanted a sandwich.. I had no idea that was two layers of Cocaine with a layer of heroin in the middle.. THAT WILL FUCK YOU UP...

So,,, now that I've been educated about all the modern lingo.. I'm pretty sure I'm..

UP AGAINST A STEM!

GOOGLE IT BITCHES.. IT AIN'T GOOD!

NOW.. DOES ANYBODY KNOW WHO'S THE

Cabbage head who's all Chalked up  and being the Carpet patrol?
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and on another subject. I ooze hotness even in my old age!

While I could sit here and pretend I don't know, it would be a lie.  I do know.  I do understand.  I really do.

I understand about collecting online stalkers.  I'm just that fucking hot.  Often my hotness drips from the screen of a man's computer until he can not handle it anymore. 

   That is how stalkers are built.  I'm sad that it happens, but I really can't change my hotness.  No matter how many birthdays I have, the hotness stays.  I know, strange right?  Can't help it, I'm a freak of nature.

The fact that I run a Royal Whore House, only seems to make my hotness even hotter.  It's been freaking years since I worked the streets, but still, the idea that I might, draws the online stalkers.  You know who you are.  The one armed men out there that now have their one good arm in a sling because of my hotness.  I'm so sorry.  I tried to tone down my hotness, but, well, I hang with hot bitches and it just ain't gonna happen.

I know I know, I'm a granny.. but the hotness that is me, just hangs around.

So, please, if you must stalk me, please do it from a distance.  We were shocked to see how much sperm had been shot at the Old site, when we starting taking it apart and renovating it for the ladies.  Please Please, it's ok to Jack off to my hotness, but please.. remember this...

Paper towels are normally on sale!

That is how this new site rolls.  There is a really cool little X up there that you can click to leave if you can't handle my hotness, or , you are out of paper towels..