It's a rant of sorts. Mostly I'm just bored. We all know I get sucked in to shit. If shit is around, I'm drawn to it. If it's a bad situation, I sure as hell am going to run as hard as I can toward it. I love a good challenge.
Take my life for instance. Marriage.. yeppers before the Great King, I married shit. Sucked me in faster than a cow in quick sand. Only thing good about that asswipe fucktard was he had one good swimmer. Well, the horny ole bastard had a lot more than one, but I only got one. He believed in spreading the swimmers around.
Then, let's look at jobs. I get all WHOOT WHOOP about a job. I believe every promise they make. I'm more stupid than a blind lamb. I walk into the same barb wire fence twenty times and still go, "Well fuck, who knew that was going to fucking hurt?".
Who remembers the Cunt Blister? Yea, begged to be a part of my life. I was all, "Holy shit, someone wants to actually be my friend!". I was jumping up and down with excitement. I took her under my wing, taught her to be an awesome street corner hooker. I ordered my other hookers to teach her, to love her, to bring her into the fold. I bitch slapped The Dutchess when she questioned my sanity over this. that fucking bitch is never going to let me live that one down!
Raise your hand if you remember what happened. That's right. The sneaking fucking slut faced whore went behind the kingdom trying to steal all the hookers. She snuck off to Oz and tried to steal it out from under us. When she got caught, just before the Splash, she claimed it wasn't stealing. That loud mouth fucking whore faced cunt blister cried like a little girl who peed her panties on the first day of school, as the gators chomped away at her.
Who remembers the Lazy Dazed Dud? Yea, another one that wanted to be a Royal. Do you remember the guilt trip she laid on us when she did not win the public election? Do you remember how PWT fought to bring her into the fold? Do you remember how we loved her? Do you remember what she did? Yea, another wise choice in my life. I should have told PWT to go organized her damn shoe closet and leave the picking of Royals to her sisters.
So, as you can see.. I'm not good at picking things in my life. I go, oh look, a shiny new penny and run as hard as I can to pick it up and love it. Thus, my addictions.
Facebook.. hate that fucker.. am totally addicted to it. Why? because of the fucking games she whispers as she hangs her head. Favorite game? odd socks she whispers as she hangs her head and looks away. That's right asshats, I'm addicted to their Odd Socks game. I am so addicted, I actually let more than my family and closest friends on my facebook friends list. Granted, I restricted them.. but they are there.
Why is this an issue? Because in all their wisdom, Oak Systems decide to fix it. It was not broken, but they needed to fix it. Busy work.. job security. So, what was once a game I looked forward to playing is now just a bug bite on my left nipple. There are no socks to pick from. There are no friends to give to. When I bin socks, the next five socks are the same socks. Every level has socks you can't get. It's been ruined.
Why does this upset me? Because I begged The Dutchess to join me over there to play. After much begging and pleading she agreed. Now it's all fucked up and no fun. Raise your hand if you know what that means for the Queen? You are right. The bitch is never going to let me hear the end of it
So, now I have to go through my friends list, dump all the people that are just there to play odd socks. There is a bright side to it. I'm met a dozen great new people that will be staying on my friends list. I guess that is why I run head first into any brick wall offered. I always end up with one good thing. However, these skull fractures are starting to add up. Pretty soon gray matter is going to start oozing out through the cracks.
Guess I need to rethink how I live my life. I am a little old to be constantly cracking my skull open on life.
I hope you have a wonderful day and can avoid the pit fall of ODD SOCKS.. I give that game and it's creators ZERO glasses of gin. Had they not fucked it up I would have handed them an entire bottle. we keep a case of the cheap watered down stuff behind the bar for just these kind of situations .
Sound off Bitches
We need to start leaving marks on our bedposts for head injuries instead of the johns we steal from. And Odd Socks is my downfall as well. I read then think I will take a small break to play a quick few minutes. Hours later and wondering where the hell the time went. The screwed that game up yet I can't walk away.
ReplyDeleteI have set up a goal to only be on facebook 20 minutes in the morning and 20 at night unless a hooker has a problem and needs me in group therapy. I will kick this addiction. I will not let bloggers fall by the way side, because of something like facebook. I love my bloggies too much for that. If blogging fails, it won't be because I did not try and help hold it together.
DeleteWoman, it's not your problem. It's THEIR problem. You can't help that you are awesome and everyone outside our castle gates are fucktards determined to crush people to satisfy their pathetic excuse for an ego.
ReplyDeleteThose that matter, love you, those that hurt you aren't worth worrying about. Scrape their nasty shit off your Jimmy Choo's and keep walking. They don't deserve more attention than that.
You always make me smile. Now, get back to work! I just noticed my glass is only half full.
DeleteI won't say I told you so....aww fuck it. I'm not that nice.
ReplyDeleteI TOLD YOU SO, BITCH!
Don't trust anyone, except me, because I may fall, crash, break things, but I will never be a cunt blister fucktard. I won't even get started on fucking facebook OR odd socks. Shit gives me anxiety just thinking about it. I need a brownie.
xoxo
You need to make a fresh batch of brownies. I had a bad day. I only saved you one. I'm off to do fly bys now.
Delete