As Dutchess and I were busy unpacking and stashing the goods we had smuggled back into the kingdom, The Royal Sister Wife was busy dealing with a pack of pissed off high dollar hookers.
Seems they wandered down to their favorite street corner and found a washed up hooker with Cu#t Blisters and a missing Middle Finger on their corner. They were livid.
They came stomping back to the Kingdom demanding that something be done about this piece of shit that had taken over their corner.
If there is one thing we can't stand, it's pissed off High Dollar hookers. They are down right deadly shots with those spike heels they wear. When they are pissed off, the shoes fly.
So, the elders decided to wander down to the corner and check out the situation before we made any decisions. Sure enough the rumors were true. The money making corner had been invaded while we were gone.
After a short conversation with this skank, it was discovered she had come from the imaginary world of Oz were her pink flamingos had been eaten by wolves.
It appears that the tin man really didn't have a heart. He watched as her beloved flamingos were eaten, then he made her a hat out of the feet.
When she turned to the straw man for help, it was discovered he had hocked the brain he was given for a cheap bottle of whiskey. He was of no help to her.
When the lion saw the wolves, he ran into the woods, leaving her to take care of the kingdom alone.
In her panic to leave, the poor skank had locked herself out of her castle and was on the street whoring for compliments and pats on the back.
Well, we are pretty easy to get along with, but even we know you can't build a kingdom around a tin man with no heart, a straw man with no brain and a chicken as lion. We didn't have much sympathy for her, but we really didn't want her hanging around our street either.
The Queen came up with a brilliant idea. HACKsaw. A HACKsaw can get through any lock. If you own a HACKsaw, you own the world. So, The Queen, being the loving and caring person she is, used the HACKsaw to let the Skank back into her Castle, thus, removing her from our street corner.
We are pretty harsh, but even we don't want to see someone CRASH and burn just for the simple joy of watching them go through what they had put others through. There is no way we would ever want someone to feel the hurt we felt when something we had poured our heart and soul in to was taken from us with one simple post.
So, all is well in the Kingdom. The High Dollar Hookers are back in their rightful places. The HACKsaw has been resharpened and put back in it's case.
We are so pleased that our security was tested and we are quite sure that any future attacks on our corners will be met with the same action as went on tonight!
We sort of let our girls run a little wild tonight.. just to get it out of their system. We trusted that our Limo driver Sir, would bring them home safe.
The Queen signing off
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