tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-49706561409079162832024-02-20T11:04:58.028-08:00The Queen of WTF?The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.comBlogger30125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-70492280876308347222021-01-25T03:24:00.001-08:002021-01-25T03:24:08.920-08:00Old Age is a Bitch!
Not everything in life is funny, or easy.
I find that blogging is harder these days as life gets harder and things get less funny. It use to be every day was just another day of life altering humor. It was easy to blog. You just woke up, lived, blogged. Today, it is an effort. Not to blog, but to get up and live.
It's called old age. That fucker takes The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-65276349001696419192021-01-24T03:00:00.001-08:002021-01-24T03:00:04.206-08:00Lady's Turn. Yesterday I talked about the ads for men's products, that piss me off. Now.. the ladies have a turn.
first of all..douche bags. No, I don't mean that co-worker sitting next to you. Not that kind of douche bag. I'm talking "summer's eve".
I'm old enough to remember the kind of douche bag my mother used.
In fact, I'm old enough to remember my parents The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-73665570754773023772021-01-23T04:00:00.001-08:002021-01-23T04:00:07.715-08:00Listen to Bobo, Bobo knowsThere are a couple things in life that just make no sense at all. We are suppose to be at the top of the food chain. We are suppose to be evolved enough to make sane and rational decisions about what we need.. and yet..
I'm sorry guys, but if you are in need of this little jewel.. please listen to Bobo. If Bobo is not rising to the occasion, Bobo is tired. Bobo knows The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-20729973448117909102021-01-22T14:05:00.000-08:002021-01-22T14:05:51.060-08:00Update on the Kingdom
It has been several years since you have heard from the
Kingdom. Here is an WTF went down.
The Hookers joined
the Union and discovered it was illegal for Dutchess and I to take 90% of their
income right off the top. Bitches forgot
we provided everything for them out of that profit. Ungrateful little brats threw a huge tantrum.
The Vet got me drunk on cheap gin, stuck a The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-75701257200801058912015-12-01T03:35:00.000-08:002017-02-04T07:43:00.778-08:00Class Reunion Looms In The Future
A while back I was informed that my 40th Class Reunion was looming in the future. Shit.
I looked through the Facebook thing and saw that most of my old classmates have become responsible adults.
They have spouses, kids, Grandkids, respectable jobs, houses, fancy cars, and tons of friends, and most of them look like they should be going to our 20th Reunion instead of our 40th. The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-53693313167299245072015-07-10T01:33:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:08.354-07:00You think Husband in a Jar freaks you out?
So now that I'm getting a new castle and all, people are starting to offer to help me move, and decorate. Problem is, they just get freaked out when I say.. no that can not go there, that is where HUSBAND IN A JAR sits. Or, don't open that closet, I have HUSBAND IN A JAR there.. freaks their asses out.. like screaming freaks em out..
Really, that is what freaks you out? &The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-17339118251402270322015-07-09T02:36:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:07.880-07:007 out of 10 Women Say....
I recently did a little survey about husbands.. and I'm telling you here is what I discovered.
Years ago, I got HUSBAND IN A JAR... which we all know pissed me off for a very long time.. Not that he's in the damn jar, just how and when he got there.
It's a real shock to your system to one day be walking into one of the finest dining establishments with a six foot cowboy on your arm then The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-27200435902502664352015-07-04T11:17:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:08.105-07:00Doing Mach 70 in Ford!
So those that know us in real life know that about 3 times during the summer months the generations of Royals go back to the village of the common folk.
PWT has decided that in my old age it is not safe for me to do the driving and she will take over that task.. god help us all..
We just took that little journey a couple weeks ago for the second time this summer. Fuck The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-24346303649878425412015-07-03T04:42:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:08.044-07:00Don't Forget to Pull the Rip Cord
When your life spirals, it's a pretty scary ride. If you can stay calm on the way down there is a hell of a view.
You can clearly see those that let you down.
You can clearly see those who stood by you.
You can clearly see every mistake you made.
You can clearly see every olive branch you extended.
You can clearly see the marks in the dirt where you fell.
You can The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-53413017399798464512014-12-18T17:00:00.002-08:002019-06-23T11:31:08.291-07:00The Pink Poinsettia vs The Red JarSo today was quite interesting. It's getting down to the wire for Christmas and I have no clue what to get Ogre Child. I got PWT's gift bought and wrapped, but OC is a little more complicated.
I'm thinking if all else fails, I'll have a few unsupervised days with her after Christmas.. I'll teach her to mix a good gin and tonic. What's better to give a seven year old than a The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-36212919318420037012014-10-30T05:18:00.004-07:002019-06-23T11:31:08.167-07:00Aging without Grace and Dignity.
That's right folks, there is NO grace or dignity in growing older. Things you take for granted are the very things you can't trust when you get old.
One thing is, we need naps. In our younger days we could party all night, run home and shower, go to work, rinse and repeat. That ain't happening when you get older. Now its, go to work, be thankful you work from The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-51530377916870422612013-06-11T00:01:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:08.230-07:00drugs, hotness and paper towels.
As most of you know, my temporary Castle is in the hood of this small little town.. That's right folks.. I got me some gangsters here.. I am in slumtown USA.. and.. I'm finding out.. I just don't fit in with today's cool kids.. and here is why..
One of my neighbors invited me over to snort some Coke.. I'm all in for that shit.. I assumed we were gonna break open a case of Cola The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-1906298407476503652013-06-01T19:12:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:31:07.981-07:00Warm Beer Blues!
Some days I wander around in my head.
I let my imagination be freely fed.
By the streams of thoughts that spill from my mind
and I wonder how I became so defined.
My world appears in black and white,
I fall into a pit of fight or flight.
I wish for the way things were long ago
when fingers would fly and humor would flow.
I have the humor, but it's stuck in my brain
The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-57411042291906480312013-04-20T18:18:00.001-07:002019-06-23T11:34:36.619-07:00For All That is Good and Holy!As old people we have dedicated our lives to the lives of our children. When they were hurt or sick we did everything that we could to make them feel better. I remember the Princess had a terrible time taking meds, so the Pharmacy would make sure we got bubble gum flavored this and grape flavored that... anything to make my poor baby take her meds and feel better.
Those kids have now grown upThe Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-72631099839819117712013-04-18T01:00:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:28:08.758-07:00Pussy Shaver story
If you follow my tweets and my facebook, you know that I commented
that I hadn't shaved my legs for a while.. being a widow and all.. what
the hell is the reason to waste time..
Well, Princess K
must have gotten a little grossed out over that concept because she got
her old Mom an Electric Razor for Christmas.
When
I first opened it I really didn't see her good intentions behind it.
The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-135808690276530992013-04-05T05:52:00.001-07:002019-06-23T11:28:08.603-07:00The Unsupervised Visitation!
That's right people, I got an unsupervised visitation with O.C. It seems that PWT and Prince Charming's shifts overlapped yesterday. I love when that happens. When they have overlapping shifts, The Queen gets called in.
Now, the neighbors are never too thrilled when this happens, but OC and I are. We get a little tired of constantly being told no, or after whileThe Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-8827302856150714792013-04-03T19:30:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:28:08.820-07:00Charlie the Penis Pig Plant
Anyone who knows me at all, knows I can not keep a plant alive for more than 4 days in the house.
I come from a long line of green thumbs.
I am not one.
The fact that PWT survived in the house for as many years as she did just amazes me. I'm not very domestic.
The longest I've kept a pet alive is 4 years.
Blue Fish has been with me a year.
Blue Fish is a miracle.
I'mThe Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-42321893272475488812013-04-03T06:41:00.002-07:002019-06-23T11:28:08.695-07:00The Skull Fractures of LIfe!
It's a rant of sorts. Mostly I'm just bored. We all know I get sucked in to shit. If shit is around, I'm drawn to it. If it's a bad situation, I sure as hell am going to run as hard as I can toward it. I love a good challenge.
Take my life for instance. Marriage.. yeppers before the Great King, I married shit. Sucked me in faster than a cow inThe Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-1019849687923694392013-03-31T09:16:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:27:04.287-07:00Happy Easter!
I am spending it in the ER with my favorite gator. Seems the Easter Bunny can not swim very fast. Also appears my favorite gator is allergic to Bunnies. So here we are, waiting to see if they can save a gator.
It all started out very innocent. The Easter Bunny bid Santa Clause and the Tooth Fairy a good evening and headed out on his annual run. Hopping house to The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-4781376625031570062012-08-30T08:40:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:27:04.440-07:00Newest Gov. Program! Let's get behind it with our dollars! Do you ever think about your life? What you endured. Who you loved and lost? I REALLY try not to do that much. It bothers me. I didn't have a fun childhood. I screwed up my life with a couple marriages that never should have been. But.. I did do one thing right... I made the Princess.. aka PWT.
I can say, I was never arrested for weed,, or for The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-71716383904363559292012-08-25T14:31:00.000-07:002019-06-23T11:27:04.681-07:00
Walk a mile in my shoes.
If you do, I will kick your ass! It will prove you have been in my shoe closet!
Don't judge a book by it's cover!
What the F dumbass? What you don't have a kindle? Don't even know what the cover looks like!
People who live in glass houses should not throw stones!
WTF? Glass house? People who live in The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-52616839864847226962012-07-31T12:33:00.001-07:002019-06-23T11:27:04.563-07:00A few little hints from an old woman,, who once lived in a shoe!
OK peeps.. here's the deal.. Enough is a freaking nuff..
pile one more thing on my plate and I will puke on your new shoes.
I don't give a rats ass how much they cost, how far you traveled to buy them or who you blew to get them..
I will puke on them..
Here is a list of things that totally annoy me.. just in case you want to know.
If I have known you 186 days, and you have,, The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-5546481568668348042012-06-24T00:39:00.001-07:002019-06-23T11:27:04.621-07:00Get your headlight out of my ASS!
So, PWT, OC and The Queen, took a little road trip the last couple days. Not far, but far enough from the kingdom to put the Queen, outside her comfort zone. Queenie is use to Clyde driving her every place she goes. This trip, Queenie drove.
Remember, I'm totally directionally challenged. Yes, I will argue with the damn GPS and I can't read road signs The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-76743485276844986842012-02-12T05:55:00.000-08:002019-06-23T11:27:04.742-07:00The Country Girl and City Life!Well, not exactly "city life" it's more like "apartment life"!
What happens when you take a Country Girl, and toss her in an apartment? BLOG FODDER that's what happens..
I live in a little complex where there are four apartments. It was the perfect set-up when I moved in. The back apartment had a man about my age, who would sit on the back deck and smoke a ciggie The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4970656140907916283.post-88982234246894169392012-02-10T10:35:00.000-08:002019-06-23T11:27:04.805-07:00EXERCISING YOUR LAZY HUSBAND!cou
The Queen
signing off
Sound off Bitches
The Queenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03658664607822174081noreply@blogger.com0