Please do NOT expect daily blog posts. Things are what they are. The voices are pretty much in control, and those bitches drink.. so it will be random!

Awe inspired post!

I was going to totally awe inspire you dudes and dudettes today.  I was going to dazzle your asses with my upbeat post.

The one where I tell you I’ve decided to make up with the family and run back into the folds of their warm and wonderful love.

I was going to tell you how I went to church and found God.. And now my life is all wonderful and I love everyone.

I was going to tell you how I have seen the error of my evil ways, and have turned over a new leaf.

I wanted to inspire you to follow in my footsteps and live for the day.

I was sure you would enjoy my story about how I found the little puppy by the side of the road with the burr in his foot and how I stopped my car and helped him, then found his owners.

I really wanted you to hear the wonderful story of how I got the kitten out of the tree for the little girl that was crying in the yard next door.

But instead.. I’m gonna tell you..

I still can’t stand those fuckers up North.

And I’m gonna tell ya, I stopped by God’s house the other day, the damn door was locked.  I left him a nasty note and flipped him off as I drove away.  I mean really.. I don’t lock my door.. He’s suppose to see all, so if someone was robbing his house, he should see it.. And… he is suppose to have the power to turn them into stone or something isn’t he.  The popo would catch them. .they are the dudes that are stone!

I may have smoked some funky leaves today..

I jumped out of my car and kicked the shit out of that whining little fucking puppy.  Dumb fuck.. Perfectly fenced yard and the little rat bastard digs under it and gets a burr.. Fuck him..

And as far as that damn crying girl next door.. Fucking whining little bitch… “oh,, my kitty is stuck in the tree.. Wahiawa”

No problem,.. I walked in the garage,, grabbed a saw.. And cut the fucking tree down …

There you little brat.. Your flat cat is under that limb over there.. Now.. Shut the fuck up!

So, while I planned on posting a wonderful inspiring blog post today… well.. Life just doesn’t work that way here in Kansas..

Have a nice day…

No gin was spilled in the making of this post!
 
 
 
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2 comments:

  1. Good hell. I snorted coke out of my nose. Coke Zero, don't get all "she's doing coke now" on me.

    I was ready to head on over and get you to the nearest shrink. If you turned a new leaf, I wouldn't be able to hang with you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I thought this one would start your morning off right! I"M BAAAAAACK!

      Delete

I have more personalities than you have bras. Deal with it. Do your best to keep up. Feel free to leave a comment, chocolate or gin, your choice! Oh, if you stopped by wearing your asshole pants... I have no problem with nasty bullshit. I'll dish it back to you so fast you'll choke on it.. so go ahead... make my day!