Please do NOT expect daily blog posts. Things are what they are. The voices are pretty much in control, and those bitches drink.. so it will be random!

Indians and the Mighty Machine

All the stories are not unhappy in my life.  After all, even an Ice Cube can't survive without happy stories.  Some of my favorite stories are those with the ten little Indians.  We were a tribe of our own.  We played by our own rules, we made up rules if we didn't like the ones we had, and we were unstoppable.  There were not enough adults in the world, to keep us in line, when we were all together.



As you know, there was one Uncle that was not all "warm and fuzzy" like the rest of the Aunts and Uncles.  He was very much a lone wolf.  He is the father of the Little Engine that Couldn't.  There are many stories about that. Here is one of my favorites.

As little Indians, we were perfectly capable of entertaining ourselves for days on end.  If there was a barn and a rock, we had a game.  Only we knew the rules to the game or how to play, but it was still a game that could entertain us for hours on end.  Rarely did you find us sitting on the floor being quiet.  It just was not our style.

One afternoon we had been playing in the barn for hours.  We had not heard Uncle Lone Wolf, pull into the yard with the big dirt mover he was using to build a dam.  After hours of play we decided to head towards the house for a cold drink of water.  Emerging from the barn we see it.. The huge dirt mover, sitting there all alone.

We looked around and saw that no adults were in sight.  Hmmm.. what to do,, what to do..  Well, being Indians, we knew exactly what to do..ATTACK AND CAPTURE!

The dirt mover was a fort, and we attacked.  We over took the fort.  We climbed over every inch of that dirt mover exploring.  I'm pretty sure we captured many soldiers that day.  Remember, this was back in the day when you didn't have a play station or a Wii.  You had to make your own fun.

After an hour or so of capturing the fort, we were exhausted and hot.  We headed into the house for that drink, and then off to the woods to eat our apples or sandwiches.  Kids back then, just had to be on the move.

It was several hours later when Uncle Lone Wolf decided to fire up the dirt mover and head back to building the dam.  Imagine his horror when he turned the key and nothing happened.  Here he was in his fancy smancy power machine,, and it was dead in the water.  Oh the embarrassment of it all.

We heard him yell and we watched from our hidden camp in the woods as he struggled in the heat to figure out why his mighty machine would not start.  We spoke among ourselves of what could be wrong.  Surely, he had forgotten to turn the key.  No, I'm pretty sure the spark plugs are bad.  Might be the butterfly valve in the exhaust pipe locked shut.  Oh, we had all the answers.

The more the Lone Wolf struggled with the mighty machine, the madder he got.  He was not our favorite, so the madder he got, the more we giggle, as we stayed hidden in the woods.  This was very funny entertainment.

Then, it happened.  It seems the Ten Little Indians, had not considered how muddy their feet were when they climbed onto the mighty machine to capture it.  It seems, every place we stepped we left little Indian footprints.  It also appears, in our rush to capture the Mighty Fort, we had stepped on some pretty important wiring, ripping it from it's proper place in the Mighty Machine, thus, rendering it useless to the Lone Wolf.

Well, Lone Wolf lost his mind.  How dare these parents allow these Indians to run wild without supervision or discipline.  We could hear him yelling at Hagatha and Father as we cowered in the hidden camp in the woods.  The giggling was done, we had never heard Lone Wolf so mad.

Father went to the shop, got the tools and proceeded to help lone wolf fix his Mighty Machine.  Then, he pulled out his hundred year old John Deere and gave the ole boy a jump start.  This, only added fuel to the fire that Lone Wolf had smoldering.  How humiliating it had to be for him to have his Mighty Machine, jump started by his little Brother's second generation, held together with baling wire, John Deere.

The Mighty Machine fired and Uncle Lone Wolf roared from the farm.  The Indians stayed hidden in the woods until long after they could no longer hear the Mighty Machine.  One by one, they exited the camp and appeared in front of Father.

As we stood there, knowing we were caught, and in big trouble, we practiced in our heads the excuse we had formed in the woods.  " well, we saw this snake crawling in the cab and we did not want Uncle Lone Wolf to get bitten, so we were trying to catch it!"

Imagine our shock when Father looked at us, shook his head, and walked away laughing, before we could even open our mouths.

From that day forward, we knew, Uncle Lone Wolf, was going to be a very easy target for our pranks.

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4 comments:

  1. Good times. I have precious few of these kinds of memories, I hope I can give my kids (or whatever little ones are put into my life) memories like this.

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  2. I like this side of our writing. It brought back memories of my summers in the woods and exploring. Thanks.

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  3. our was suppose to be your. sorry

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  4. omg, I can see you as a child as I read these and I'm loving it.

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I have more personalities than you have bras. Deal with it. Do your best to keep up. Feel free to leave a comment, chocolate or gin, your choice! Oh, if you stopped by wearing your asshole pants... I have no problem with nasty bullshit. I'll dish it back to you so fast you'll choke on it.. so go ahead... make my day!